Thursday, January 8, 2009

Here I am let the journey begin!

Hi.....
My name is Ally and I have been in denial about my health. When I look in the mirror the image I see is actually much slimmer and more attractive then the reality. Now it doesn't take a psychologist to tell me that this is not entirely a bad thing. Obviously I do not have self esteem or self worth problems; when I look in the mirror I am not disgusted by what I see. How ever it does not mean that I see what is really there. Every now and then I will see a photo or try on some clothes and think.... "hang on I don't look like that"... or "hey these pants should fit me." Because of my positive self image I have been in denial about my health. I was absolutely shocked to discover that my BMI indicates I am obese, and that my waist measurement also indicates the same. I realise it is finally time to draw the line and address the issue!

I am a very happy person and I have everything I could ever ask for in my life. I am not doing this so that my life will become 'better' I do not expect that when I lose a little weight I will have all the answers. I am not relying on it either!!! I am doing this for my health. Which leads me to the next goal..... ahhhh the smoking monkey.

So I have been smoking for about 10 years. Mostly I would not smoke more then 5-10 cigarettes a day, but when I am out socializing this can easily escalate to 20-25 (argh!!!!!) But I am a loyal smoker (if that makes sense) I actually believe I enjoy smoking and wonder if I will ever not look forward to a cigarette. But I am smart enough to realise that these thoughts are the result of an addiction and years of being brainwashed. So I figure if I am going to maintain my physical health I need to be checking the smoking too. ( I also have the most amazing husband on earth and it breaks his heart that I smoke.... I really don't want to hurt him anymore)

The stats

Weight 80.6
Upper arms 33 cm
Upper thigh 60cm
Waist 98cm
Neck 36 cm (oh my god my aarm is nearly as big as my neck... sigh)
Size 14-16
BMI 30

I hope that you will join me on my journey and hold me to my goals. Hopefully I will discover some tips along the way and I may be able to impart some wisdom upon you...... but lets just one step at a time hey :)


(PS I am in total denial about being a smoker.... after 10 years I still think I am in control.....admitting I am not, and that maybe I actually am addicted is a crazy big step for me)

4 comments:

  1. Hi Ally! Great job on embracing a new lifestyle with a healthy attitude. My mirror also seems to have the same problem as yours - I look fine, and then I see a picture of myself. It's a little like reverse anorexia - I look in the mirror and I see a perfectly normal (ok, maybe just a LITTLE on the chubby side) girl. Then this hideous three chinned monster looks out at me from a photo. :)

    Good luck and keep up the blogging!

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  2. Fit bethlin, I have always said it was reverse anorexia...I am glad I am not alone :) Photos can be truly awful things can't they... hopefully I will be shocked in a great way one day.

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  3. Hello! Just found your blog! I started loosing weight in the fall and started a blog a few weeks back about it. I have about 66 lbs to loose, or about 30 kg. I've lost 20 lbs so far (about 9 kg). I actually have a giveaway at my site for you or any reader who are interested!

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  4. I am just the same as you in the "thinner than I am" view of myself.. lol I talked about that on my blog-- it's totally the truth .. Good luck on your journey!

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